Maybe it's WHY they don't taste like apples?

Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Is it just me, or is there a signifiant trend towards Jacks in Apple Jacks? It seems to me like it used to be a bit more equitable, with the same percentage of Apples to Jacks. Recently, the distribution is totally skewed, though I can't imagine it costs and more or less to make "Artifical Apple Flavoring #4" than it does "Artificial whatever-the-hell-Jacks-are-supposed-to-taste-like #2". So what's the big idea?

Well, this may surprise some of our younger readers, but the green Apple pieces weren't introduced until 1993! Before that it was just straight-up Jacks. Evidently the new campaign makes what they're supposed to taste like clearer: Cinnamon. What they taste like is exactly what the Apple pieces taste like, artifical sweetener. (Possible product idea: Artificial Sweetener-Os. Tagline: "To hell with it, we're not even going to fake it any more." Americans would appreciate the honesty and buy in droves.)

Not that I have any vested interest in Apple Jacks, being that I just buy them when they're on sale, but couldn't they come up with a better line than "Apple Jacks. Apple or Cinnamon? Who will be the winna-mon?" It's like someone made a joke in the marketing department, and the VP in charge of advertising had sadly lost his sense of humor in a freak tapdancing accident.

Slow news day.

Eldritch: I'm reminded of the infamous Cadbury Creme Egg shrinkage scandal. Cadbury's official line was that the confections were exactly the same size as ever, but that you have grown larger, causing them to seem smaller. That's all well and good, until Office actor BJ Novak brought examples of the current and previous years' creme eggs onto Conan O'Brian, demonstrating incontrovertibly that the eggs were smaller this year.

What's really odd about this story is the fact that BJ Novak apparently warehouses a year's supply of Cadbury Creme Eggs every Easter.


Pseudonym said...

I can't stand that guy. I want to just lasso the smug right out of him.
The thing is, this wasn't a cost-cutting measure. SOMEONE at Kelloggs has it out for the green Os.

Eldritch said...

I can just see a mustache-twirling villain, biding his time at the Kellogg's factory, surreptitiously decreasing the green-O ratio bit-by-bit, year after year, until they're forgotten altogether.

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